Life's surprises...

...not just the good ones...

Life is full of surprises. It's always surprising to find out something new.

This week I've found out lots of things. For my own sake I'm going to list them all, good and bad. That way they wont have the power if the surprise element should they happen again in the future.

In order not to depress myself, or anyone who may happen to read this, I'm going to list alternate good and then bad things. I'll end on a a good one to lift the mood!

Having composed the list, I realise that I've actually reasoned through the 'bad' elements and found good points. I've re-lettered them P for positive and N for negative.

I believe that positivity really does breed success. This way I will always look for the flip side when lady luck appears to have deserted me...

N = people you know don't always come through for you.

P= Strangers can be surprisingly nice. This surprised me because I think I had forgotten the benefit of the kind words/actions of others. Always good to remember. Sometimes has more of an impact because it's so unexpected.

N = People generally don't really want to know if you are OK or not. They just want an easy life. If you're OK then ergo so are they. If you're not OK then this means that they feel obliged to 'deal' with it in some way.

P = You are best to deal With these things yourself. That way you never get disappointed. Sounds like a negative but it's really not. If you are strong enough to deal with anything yourself then you're better off all round.

N = The people closest to me have not read my blog. They don't want to. I've asked them to so they know how I feel. They still don't. They say they will (I suspect to make me be quiet) and they don't. I've given up asking them to.

P= People I don't even know have taken the time to read what I write. That fills me with a lot of nice warm feelings. You can't force people to do things but it's the ones that do it without feeling they have to that mean the most.

N = My life has changed. It will never go back to the way that it was. Everything is different.

P= The changes in my life are without a doubt for the better. I love more about my life than I have ever loved before. I am thankful for the changes.

N = Change is hard. Not just for me but for those around me. It's scary and feels like stepping out into the unknown on a pitch black night. Without a torch. With trees all around. And wolves howling in the distance.

P= The unknown is exciting. It's an incredible journey. We learn from exploring the unknown. I have learnt a lot. Ive learnt about myself and about others. In turn I will pass the new knowledge onto those around me.

N= I'm constantly tired and my child no longer sleeps through the night.

P= I get to spend precious time with my child when everyone else in the world is still and quiet and sleeping. I value those moments.

N= people don't understand my life.

P= one dag they will. One day when they have their own children they will know. they won't remember that they didn't understand now but that's not important.

N= I'm often quite emotional and never have been before.

P= it's because I've just gone through the most amazing experience of my life. That just takes some adjustment.

Of course the list goes on and on. These are just a few of the things on my mind. it makes me feel better to sort them out by writing them down (that will be the law school training).

Sorry for the odd read if anyone is still there!

Cosmic karma?

Balancing the good and the bad...

The cosmic balance is an interesting thing.

Does Karma really exist? Is it something we invent to make ourselves feel better when things don’t go to plan? Are those that really wrong us somehow in turn wronged by the entire universe?

Perhaps. Or perhaps it’s just a 'happy' coincidence when things don’t go to plan for those we despise.  Should we delight in the misfortune of others or are we just leading the way to more bad karma for ourselves?

Perhaps the fact is that we look more closely at the lives of those that we think have crossed us. That because we suddenly put their lives under the microscope,  we notice when things go wrong for them. That the things would have still happened, even if we were all best friends but we would have just perceived that in a different, less victorious light. in fact we probably would have been saying to them that all would b evened out by karma... 

Sometimes though whatever the reason, it appears nice to see ill deeds befalling those who have previously taken such glee in our own hardships. Maybe that's why we get such a smug satisfaction. Either that or it really is just an adjustment in a big universe. A mere alteration in the fabric of destiny. Swathed and hemmed to even the score. But who is it keeping score anyway? Surely its entirely depedant on circumstance, situation and of course who's side you're on...

It depends I suppose on whether you really believe that there is a grand scheme. Sure people always talk about “the grand scheme of things” and leaving things “to fate”. Does that really happen? Are we simply beings with no control of our own destiny? And surely if that is the case, what is the point of trying to do anything differently? Is it just an excuse used by those who want to relinquish responsibility of their deeds?

What’s interesting I find is the attitude people have against others. They cant just live and let live as it were. They have to try and make life as miserable as possible for others. It is those people who I think come a cropper. It is those who have the most miserable existence.

Lets face it, if you feel that in order to make yourself happy, someone else must suffer, that's  never going to make for a fairytale ending. Look at Disney. Learn from the wicked witch. Its never good for the enemy. The instigator of misery.  Are we not then making our own bad karma? Our own misery?

I believe that we should all just live our own lives, having regard for those around us and with a smile on our faces. If you can’t make yourself happy then who else has even a slight chance of doing so. if you focus on the negative then surely it will always be inevitable outcome?

If you wallow in the sadness of others. If you bask in their downfall. If you wish for them to come a cropper. Surely that's to your own detriment. You’re mainly going to make yourself unhappy.

I have no answers.

So karma may exist. The universe may need to balance. But why be the person that throws it off kilter in the first place....